Dear New York Times, did you actually read the Pew Research Center’s Women, Men, and the Economics of Marriage? I did and I find it funny how the lesson you took away from the report was that it’s so hard for successful women to find a man because men are so worried about feeling emasculated next to smarty-pants women, while I took away a more nuanced understanding of the economic climate, socio-economic class, marriage, and how women are beginning to close the wage and education gap (but they still have a long way to go).
The Times took anecdotal evidence to a whole new level with quotes from a young New York fashion stylist who broke up with her “blue-collar” boyfriend because he supposedly couldn’t handle her career success.
NYT explains:
An analysis of census data to be released Tuesday by the Pew Research Center found that she and countless women like her are victims of a role reversal that is profoundly affecting the pool of potential marriage partners.
Actually, the report didn’t really say anything about all the shitty fish in the sea. Pew’s report seemed to show that while more women have higher levels of education than men and their wages have significantly increased since 1970, people end up marrying people with similar educational levels. People with similar educational backgrounds marry and have higher incomes than people with lower levels of education. I didn’t find any of this particular doomsday scenario:
Ms. Zielinski, the fashion stylist, said her best friend, a man, told her once: “ ‘You are confident, have good credit, own your own business, travel around the world and are self-sufficient. What man is going to want you?’ He laughed, but I found that pretty depressing.”
The Washington Post did a much better job of synthesizing the study and explaining how things are changing, and that women haven’t completely surpassed men in earnings. Although, reading this chestnut of a quote affirms my aversion to marriage:
“What’s radically changed is that marriage now is a better deal for men,” said Richard Fry, co-author of the report, published by the Pew Research Center. “Now when men marry, often their spouse works quite a bit. Often she is better-educated than the guy.”
I think it’s a bit nuts to crow about the “rise of the wives” or all these brand spankin’ new sugar mommas. The fact remains, in the words of the Pew report that:
Sharper growth has enabled women to narrow, but not close, the earnings gap with men. Median earnings of full-year female workers in 2007 were 71 % of earnings of comparable men, compared with 52 % in 1970.
And this:
It should be noted that men in all education categories still earn more than women.
So NYT, I’m still holding on to the belief that my boyfriend likes me because we share values and experiences and not because I make him feel like a man by earning less.
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