The Unsexiest Men in the World.

I’ve often wondered what exactly is meant by sexy.  I tend to think that sexy is subjective and one person’s creamed underwear is another person’s very dry hump.  But, Maxim has finally settled the question with their list of Hollywood’s Unsexiest Women.  I think its interesting that their list includes some of the most successful women in Hollywood–women who have gotten far in their careers using more than just their hot bods.  True, the list includes Britney Spears and everyone’s favorite crackhead Amy Winehouse, but there’s something incredibly mean-spirited and pointless about the list.  Sarah Jessica Parker is the unsexiest?  Really?  What has Carrie Bradshaw ever done to deserve that?  Maybe because she doesn’t look like Jessica Alba? 

So, in response to Maxim’s restrictive view of sexy, here’s my list of the Unsexiest Men in the World.  Disclaimer:  this is my subjective point of view.  Other people are more than welcome to disagree.  I don’t care if you want to shag Dick Cheney.  That’s your business, and not mine.

5. Spencer from The Hills.  One word:  Douchebag

4. Iranian president, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.  Denying the Holocaust is gross and most definitely unsexy.

3.  R. Kelly.  I don’t even know where to start with this one.  His music sucks and he pees on teenaged girls, yet he gets away with it.

2. Bill O’Reilly.  Blowhards don’t deserve blowjobs.

1. And it’s a tie:  Dick Cheney and George W. Bush.  Nothing makes me want to wash my hair or have a headache more than these two idiots.  Thanks for fucking up America, you losers.